The 253 Crimbo day miracle and somewhat selfish me.

Pretty much since afternoon christmas, right after all the amazing food had disappeared into my now permanently large middle, I've been glued to CNN and the story of the attempted plane attacks. Of course I am extremely happy and thankful for the fact that no one died not even the supposed terrorist and it's so much more of a miracle after seeing how close he was to killing over 300 people. But I also just realised and feel a great deal of guilt knowing that my interest has also been somewhat steeped in self interest.
See, I already had my fill of feeling like it was my responsibility in some way to respond to (I don't want to say ignorant but I won't lie, that's what I think) folks with their lively imaginations and ideas of some Nigeria wide business that involves everyone taking turns sending emails claiming royalty and promising to send lots of money for no reason to obviously very smart and discerning people who decide to send some money to get things going along. Interestingly, I get these too so obviously I am hoping to someday scam myself out of alot of money...I hope that works out soon 'cause I'm really broke these days. I'm aware of folks who seem to think all Africans are poor hut/tree dwellers (I often think I can't blame them because they only see what they are shown on tv but when I think about it I haven't been to alot of countries but I still make an effort to know more about what's really going on in these places so that when I meet an Indian who speaks English perfectly, for example, we can skip the bit where I ask 'how on earth did you learn that?' and I don't go 'so how do you feel about getting married to a stranger because they say it is widespread so surely there are no exceptions'; we are all in this world together afterall) and seem to think that meeting people like me once in a while gives them faith in the fact that the spare change they placed in charity boxes a couple times has succeeded in feeding me all my life, educating me and paying for 4 years of college at over 20k a year...well done us for taking care of our burden. Then there's some who probably think it's the aforementioned business that's kept me from lying around with flies up my nose. All good, I've made my peace with that and rely on times when people ask me stupid questions about things like this to tell these people how intensely stupid I think they are and how on earth they got into college while at the same time not realising that it is possible for few people to send lots of e-mails; Newsflash which may shock you to your core - each e-mail is not sent by a seperate Nigerian; the confidence email trick didn't even start in Nigeria or anywhere near Africa; and is still used by lots of people closer to all things Western, civilized and right *gasp* What The Fuck!!! the world has gone topsy turvy!
Anyways, so like I've said just had to pretty much deal with ideas of everyone starving and badly spelt and worded emails sent by poor, idle hoodlums in internet cafes that I cannot fathom how anyone could possibly ever take seriously. But now no doubt I will have to explain the fact that we are not all walking into planes with explosives tied to our underwear in a bid to wage 'holy war 'against the U.S. Of course, we are not the first to deal with this as everyone muslim or with a name that sounds muslim or 'looks Arab' or muslims wearing turbans which to all intents and purposes to the ignorant self absorbed of the world includes Sikh Indians and more, is immediately assumed to have some terrorist agenda. Even folks who don't really think this make jokes about it which I don't think is funny at all because there's always that one idiot, more probably, that will take you seriously. I've often pointed out how asinine it is to talk as if all the citizens of a country or even a group of countries are evil scheming terrorists planning to blow up another important location in the almighty G8, while in fact a whole lot more of their buildings have been blown up and a whole lot more of their people have died and the majority of people are thinking of the self preservation of themselves and their families and not eternal glory that begins with an explosion in the sky. But now I feel that more of what I say will be chalked down to the fact that I am now essentially defending myself (now it's gotten all closer to home) when I say stop stereotyping a country of people when you have barely tried to get to know even one of them, not that if you met one or even ten people that turned out 'bad' gives you any reason to label millions of people but whatever, what do I know I was undoubtedly malnourished as a child.
But the whole point of this was to stop thinking about how this affects me, I needed to write to myself to remind me of what is really important; that this man was in this plane and from what I can tell just needed to inject something into something else or press something (I am obviously no engineer) and the plane would have blown up and killed everyone including people on land but instead God intervened and what should have been an explosion became a minor fire. Thanks for awesome Dutchman Jasper Schuringa and every one else on that plane that acted quickly to make sure the fire did not become any worse, I can imagine that the gloriousness of life and christmas was even more acutely felt after this event and there is afterall a silver lining in every cloud(!cliche! but too tired to think of anything smarter and it works anyhow :P). Equally important are prayers for Umar A. and everyone else like him who might be harbouring thoughts like this borne of personal struggles that do not stem from religion, country or even family. Afterall, we know now that his dad had called the US embassy to warn them of the fact that he was worried about his 'radicalized' son, hardly the behaviour of a man who encouraged violent Islamist rhetoric and showing that this is the exception rather than the rule even within a family (Maybe the authorities should be talking more about why he wasn't taken seriously, but far be it from me to try and understand the great wisdom of those who are so obviously more intelligent and capable than I am, afterall I don't even know what all the red, orange and yellow etc. mean). I am Christian and proud of it but I do not hesitate to point to the Crusades, Northern Ireland, more recent abortion clinic bombers and so many more examples of Christian related terrorism to judgmental, high falluting Christians (who I sadly seem to meet everywhere being fed daily by the poison that is often Fox News) that bigotism is not specific to any religion and religion only becomes the means these people attempt to use in making their selfish ambitions legitimate.
So this has alot to do with me but not because of his nationality but because I am human and I am concerned about the direction our world is taking and I am glad for instances of heroism that gives me much needed faith in it, something that can often become greatly depleted. And I am especially glad for the life of others and this great, big Christmas miracle.
I will now stop watching CNN and go to bed.

Oh yeah, I love the snow and snow-related activities even though I have dumbly indulged in so little so far, gotta stop thinking I'll live forever.

Traveltalk

All this sad talk so far, geeeeeez, (later note; older sad sad blog no longer visible due to potentially embarassing content) so I got something that makes me happy and I've been thinking of for a while and thought maybe I should write about it. In a way it's kind of sad because I won't really be able to do it for a while maybe even never, though I try to not think that way. So, it hasn't come up yet in my after blog loves list yet (you know, those little statements at the end of my blogs about stuff I love, to be fair I've had only three so alot hasn't come up yet) but I looooove to travel (I even love packing and super packed flights with wailing babies because it often means it'll be followed by going to a new place) and I just thought up my number 1 trip route that includes all the places I want to go to most. History's great, the more ancient the better and it makes sense that the countries I most interested in visiting were the seats of the most ancient civilizations that we currently know of ; The Egyptian empire, the Persian empire, the mighty Greeks, the Turkish empire... But I don't want to rattle on and on about why I think they were awesome, this was supposed to be a short post and I intend to keep it that way.
The travel route - Begins in Greece (I am obssessed with Greece, so this makes sense), I'd need to be there for at least 2 weeks, I know even a year won't be nearly enough to drink in all of the history that foundation of all things modern has to offer my eager to be filled mind but we've got to take what we can get while it's offered, right? I won't go into all I want to do, that'll need a book. Turkey will be the next port of call as it has a great deal of Greek history attached to it as parts of the country were regarded as Greek in the past. In its own right Turkey also has a rich history as the seat of power of the Ottoman empire and I especially want to see Justinian's Hagia Sofia which was built in old Constantinople as an Eastern Orthodox church and has a rather interesting story attached to it. From Turkey I intend to take the road built by King Darius of Persia over 2500 years ago which led from North Africa to India. Of course, this may be impossible since though I know the road still exists, it was built with horses in mind as the main form of transport and may never have been modified and though I'd love to learn to ride horses I don't know how successful I'll be at that or if I'd be willing to ride one for over a week. But this is a dream and should not be bothered by the little, irksome pest that is reality. One more thing about the road, though it may seem to have made more sense to travel from North Africa since the road starts there and I definitely want to see Egypt and Ethiopia during this trip, India is the second most important place for me to get to see and I don't want to make it the last place I get to in case I start running out of time towards the end. So I continue, there will be stops on the way from Turkey to Iran because there will be cities in between and though I do not dream of seeing them, I have never been one to turn down the opportunity of visiting a new place. Then I will get to Iran, the country that was once the capital of the Persian empire which many believe to be the largest and grandest of all the empires our world has seen to date. Going back to the whole paying no regard to reality, I will pretend that Iran is not currently one of the most dangerous places to be in right now. I keep thinking maybe when it's all over, if it will ever be, but just looking at all the wonders that were formerly located in Iran and have now been reduced to dust due to war and ignorance makes me wonder if there will be anything of the past left at all in a few years. It's making me a bit teary but I was crying earlier so maybe that's why. I think my period's coming soon or something, I really never cry mainly 'cause I have issues with showing emotion, we may talk about that later. Although, the trials the everyday citizens of Iran, Iraq and other troubled countries in the middle east go through everyday so much so that it has become normal is enough reason for anyone to cry, we should all be crying and also maybe feel a bit ashamed for not caring more...
Okay, so we were in Iran, I'll visit some more between while journeying to India and then finally I will get to the end of the road in India were I fully intend to stray away from the luxuries of Mumbai/Bombay and New Delhi, the universally known Ganges river and the magnificent Taj Mahal (though I most definitely want to see all these) and visit the south of India, it's many temples and just experience as much of I can of it spritually rich history. Again I won't go into detail, this is already much more than I intended to type and I have homework and the LSATs to study for dammit! Again I must be in India for at least 2 weeks, actually it should have much more than Greece since it is so much bigger (keep in mind for revision).
So the road set forth by the King of old is now at an end and I must now retrace my steps (well not really, I'd be flying woohoo!) back to Egypt, that land of the Nile and the Pyramids of Giza and where many stories that I grew up with such as the captivity of the Jews and Joseph and Mary's flight to this land following the threat from Herod after the birth of their son supposedly take place. Maybe I will be able to see some proof of this, maybe not, I think I'd really just be happy to be there. And then at the end of the road will be Ethiopia, where some of the oldest churches in the world can be found and where rumour has it the ark of the covenant is said to be kept safe by a priest sworn to secrecy and also it is said that Mary stopped at for a while with her little baby before returning to Israel when the coast was clear. Like I said it may or may not true and I probably won't be finding out anything, lots of real historians haven't how on earth can I but I most certainly will be fulfilling a dream and that's most definitely the best, right? Plus on these travel I'll get to experience the modern as well as the old and see how they blend, people; friendly or otherwise and of course food, food's always nice. A bit of authentic Ethiopian coffee and Indian curry won't hurt at all :)
P.S. These are not all the places I want to see, not by a long stretch, there'll be the Africa trip and the Western Europe trip and the Eastern European trip and the East Asian trip and the Incan trip. This is just numero uno.
So much for keeping this short haha.

I love sniffing as I walk down an aisle full of full-bodied, rich coffee.

Words and phrases I absolutely loathe.

There's a few words that are absolute no-nos and there's a whole hullabaloo when someone (or Don Imus) decides to go on and say it on the media and stuff. There's some of that stuff here, but not very much. Most of these are used everyday by people, which makes it a whole lot more annoying because I get to hear them all the time...arrrgggghhhh

Tomboy: Who made up this word and why would anyone still use it in this day and age with all the supposed awareness about the stupidity of gender roles (which btw I think isn't really as much as you'd hope). The word essentially means 'acting like a boy' and it covers a whole myriad of things that are considered 'unladylike' and which is pretty much everything that does not involve wearing make-up and pretty floral dresses. Climb a tree; and you're encroaching on boy territory, wear trousers that don't double as a fourth layer of skin or have some kind of comment about its wearer's juiciness...you guessed it. I might be exaggerating this whole thing but I think it's important that words like this aren't used anymore because they create the whole aura of 'me man=active chest beater; you woman=passive as the proverbial doormat'. If there was a time men did all the stuff that got you out of the house,other than the latest fashionable coming out ball or some well-mannered frolicking amongst the daisies especially geared to attract eligible bachelor over yonder in case he happens to walk by(better take my handkerchief in case it needs to be dropped at some point), I am pretty sure it was more because it had been dictated that things should be that way and when faced with doing what you really want to do or having society/family approve of you, most of us unfortunately choose the latter. So, no we are not copying you great big men when we decide that perhaps we can now open doors on our own(it turns out those handles just had to be twisted anti-clockwise, who knew?). Maybe we are just realising(because it generally takes a bit of time to figure out these things and get the clitoris(yeah, I don't like the phrase 'get some balls' either) to fight the power) that we can do whatever we'd like whether it be firefighting or fine embroidery and we've always had it in us to go either way if we so please. Besides you did not invent the art of climbing a tree, it's probably been done since the first monkey got a bite of that yellow gooey fruit lying beneath a tree, looked up and saw she'd hit the motherload of banana goodness if she could just find a way to get up there. Hope you tommonkeys got that.....I think I get carried away sometimes with my words, you'd think I talk too much or something but I really don't, I swear!


'That's so gay': Alright, so I think more people agree that this shouldn't be said at all but at the same time I hear people say it quite a bit, even people I really don't expect it from at all...like some one who's actually gay but I guess it's like some black people saying the n word like it's the coolest word ever even though no one else can(or there'll be a month long discussion on the horridness of it on CNN and there'll be special guest appearances by the Reverends 'Sharp'and 'Jack')and they're fully aware of the horrible history of the word, but that's another subject so I'll stop and stay on topic before I get carried away. Anywho, so even when that's so gay is used in relation to acting 'feminine' or anything 'girly' or emotions in general, it definitely gets on my nerves because I strongly believe that the state of being gay is simply defined by being attracted to members of the same sex. While I do tend to go on about women being suppressed more and that is generally more of an issue for me simply because it's been men superior and women inferior for so long and not the other way round, I do think that men are often incredibly suppressed and there is absolutely unfair to keep men from doing what they want whether it be professional ballet or wearing pink shirts by threatening them with the label of being 'so gay' when they really aren't, as far as I'm concerned that's (Weirdly enough, the comedian Steve Byrne just came on and he's talking about how being a magician or a male cheerleader is so gay, see what I mean!) crap and that's all I'm going to say about that. The other even more annoying use of the word I'm beginning to hear more and more of is when the phrase is used in reference to something absolutely disgusting or even downright evil sometimes. What in Pete's name am I supposed to make of someone saying in response to a description of a serial killer butchering a 12 year old; 'That's so gay'. Just think about the connotations that single sentence used in that context carries with it and please, please, please be as mad as I was and am!

Alright, my hands need a holiday from typing endlessly but this is by no means over, I get pissed off alot and the list goes on forever so I intend to continue but with my blogging track record it probably won't be for another 6 months...Oh well...

I love chocolate...dark chocolate

First plop in ocean

So I'm here blogging, years after it first became the to-do thing and now when everyone's vlogging. What else is to be expected I've got a procrastinating image to uphold here. So why am I doing this, mainly because I don't like people knowing much about me and my life. I know that makes absolutely no sense at first but it really kinda does. I'm one of those really unfortunate kinds who keeps pretty much everything to herself, I think I mostly think most things that happen to me aren't really big enough to bother people with and for some reason I'm paranoid about being seen as self-absorbed so I pretty much focus on listening to everyone (well, those who want to speak to me) and in the process I get to not let out much. It's worked for me so far so if it or I ain't broke... Anywho, I do have alot of thoughts continually swirling around my brain that frequently needed to be unloaded and unfortunately don't get many chances to get flushed out, I always thought diaries were kinda iffy and even blogging isn't beyond suspicion but something's got to be done to keep me from walking around spouting little bits of brain crazy. This won't be so much a blow by blow account of my life anyway, it'll probably have very little of anything to do with what actually happens to me (too boring) I'll just be unloading all my thoughts about our world, what's happening, what sucks and if I can find any of that stuff what deserves a thumbs up in my book. Not trying to be a pessimistic but the latter seems to be few and far between but I will try to write a whole lot on that whenever I find any.
I love Bollywood.